* Joke 1 – Rajnikanth doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
* Joke 2 – Rajnikanth killed the dead sea.
* Joke 3- Rajnikanth makes onions cry.
* Joke 4 – Rajnikanth once wrote a cheque, the bank bounced!
* Joke 5 – Rajnikanth can drown a fish.
* Joke 6 – Rajnikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.
* Joke 7 – Rajnikanth knows Victoria’s secret.
* Joke 8 – If Rajni was born 100 years earlier, British would have fought to get independence from India.
* Joke 9 – Rajnikanth’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajnikanth.
* Joke 10 – Once a cobra bit Rajnikanth’s leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
* Joke 11 – Rajnikanth can kill two stones with one bird.
* Joke 12 – Rajnikanth has already been to Mars, that’s why there are no signs of life there.
* Joke 13 – Micheal Jordan to Rajnikanth: I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours. Can you? Rajni: Rascala, how do you think the earth spins?
* Joke 14 – Rajnikanth has counted to infinity, twice.
* Joke 15 – Rajnikanth can delete the Windows Recycle Bin.
* Joke 16 – Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Rajnikanth can throw Brett Favre even further.
* Joke 17 – Hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Rajnikanth can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.
* Joke 18 – Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajnikanth.
* Joke 19 – When you say “no one’s perfect”, Rajnikanth takes this as a personal insult.
* Joke 20 – Rajnikanth is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
* Joke 21 – It takes Rajnikanth 20 mins to watch 60 minutes
* Joke 22 – There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Rajnikanth lives in Chennai
* Joke 23 – Rajnikanth once consumed an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink once.
* Joke 24 – The only thing that runs faster and longer than Rajnikanth are his films.
* Joke 25 – Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajnikanth there is no other way.
* Joke 26 – Rajnikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes.
* Joke 27 – Rajnikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.
* Joke 28 – Rajnikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.
* Joke 29 – Rajnikanth doesn’t move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajnikanth.
* Joke 30 – Rajnikanth knows Victoria’s secret.
* Joke 31 – Water boils faster when Rajnikanth stares at it.
* Joke 32 – Google won’t find Rajnikanth because you don’t find Rajnikanth; Rajnikanth finds you.
* Joke 33 – Rajnikanth leaves messages before the beep.
* Joke 34 – Rajnikanth electrocuted Iron Man.
* Joke 35 – Rajnikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray.
* Joke 36 – Rajnikanth goes to court and sentences the judge.
* Joke 37 – Rajnikanth can teach an old dog new tricks.
* Joke 38 – Rajnikanth once had a heart attack. His heart lost.
* Joke 39 – Rajnikanth can lick his elbows.
* Joke 40 – Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary, Hero etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajnikanth was born.
* Joke 41 – The statement “nobody can cheat death”, is a personal insult to Rajnikanth. Rajni cheats and fools death everyday.
* Joke 42 – Rajnikanth can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin.
* Joke 43 – Time and tide wait for Rajnikanth.
* Joke 44 – Rajnikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, that’s when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean.
* Joke 45 – Rajnikanth can answer a missed call.
* Joke 46 – Rajnikanth’s brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhury’s.
* Joke 47 – The quickest way to a man’s heart is with Rajnikanth’s fist.
* Joke 48 – Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined “victim” as “one who has encountered Rajnikanth”.
* Joke 49 – Rajnikanth is a champion in the Game ‘Hide n seek’, as no one can hide from Rajnikanth.
* Joke 50 – Rajnikanth is a weapon created by God to use on doomsday to end the world.
* Joke 51 – Aliens do indeed exist. They are just too scared to visit a planet that Rajnikanth is on.
* Joke 52 – When Rajnikanth plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.
* Joke 53 – Rajnikanth doesn’t answer nature’s call nature answers Rajnikanth’s call!!
* Joke 54 – In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajnikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.
* Joke 55 – Rajnikanth can build a snowman out of rain!
* Joke 56 – Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Rajanikanth’s PC will crash.
* Joke 57 – Once Rajni underwent a surgery…anesthesia was administered to the surgeons
* Joke 58 – When Rajnikanth goes to a gym to workout, no one can workout since Rajini uses all the weights available.
* Joke 59 – dam and Eve are children of Rajnikanth
* Joke 60 – Rajini can eat dosa with chop sticks
* Joke 61 – Gabbar singh forgets his dialogues when he sees Rajnikanth
* Joke 62 – The box office collection of the movie Ra 1 was less than parking collection of Robot
* Joke 63 – Rajnikanth got 150 questions in exam paper asking – “Solve any 100 questions” He solved all 150 and wrote, ” Rascalla!, check any 100!
* Joke 64 – Once Rajnikanth entered bigg boss…The next day announcement was made… Rajnikanth chahte hai ki bigg boss confession room me aye
* Joke 65 – Rajnikanth can cure cancer with his first aid box
* Joke 66 – Munni Badnaam hui Rajnikanth ke liye
* Joke 67 – If Rajnikanth’s PC hangs… its time for next windows release
* Joke 68 – Rajnikanth taught yoga to Baba Ramdev
* Joke 69 – Rajnikanth can sneeze with open eyes.
* Joke 70 – Once Rajnikanth dropped a coin while he was standing in the belcony… He went down to pick it up, but it was not there! Reason? He reached there before the coin
* Joke 71 – The apple which fell on newton was actually thrown by Rajnikanth
* Joke 72 – Once Rajinikath blasted at a boy for not wearing cap in the hot sun. Today that boy is known as Himesh Reshammiya.
* Joke 73 – When Rajnikanth get angry at the Sun, it hides behind the moon… that phenomenon is called Solar eclipse.
* Joke 74 – Once Rajni was fined by cops for overspeeding at a 75 kilometers per hour zone. He was walking.
* Joke 75 – In Rajnikanth’s wedding, the fire took the saath phere of Rajnikanth and his wife
* Joke 76 – Rajnikanth can tie his shoes with his feet.
* Joke 77 – Rajnikanth once wrote his autobiography. Today that book is known as ‘Guinness book of world records’ and his childhood homework is now called Wikipedia.
* Joke 78 – Rajnikanth first takes the gold medal and then the race starts
* Joke 79 – Rajnikanth laughs at you and your silly jokes about him even before you think them up.
* Joke 80 – Some actor set benchmarks in cinema, Rajnikanth sets desk marks
* Joke 81 – Whenever Rajnikanth makes an error, it’s an invention.
* Joke 82 – Only Rajnikanth knows Choli Ke Peechhe Kya Hai.
* Joke 83 – Rajnikanth twice won arguments with his wife.
* Joke 84 – How did Paul Octopus die? He was asked to predict Rajanikanth’s death.
* Joke 85 – Rajnikanth had to make 24 runs in just 1 ball remaining. He hit the ball in such a way that it got broken into 4 pieces and he got 4 sixes.
* Joke 86 – Even Ghajini remembers Rajini.
* Joke 87 – Don Ko Pakadna Mushkil Hi Nahi Asaan Hai – For Rajnikanth
* Joke 88 – Rajnikanth can make a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.
* Joke 89 – Every morning rajni goes for spacewalk.
* Joke 90 – Computer doesn’t give warning message to Rajini… Rajini warns computer
* Joke 2 – Rajnikanth killed the dead sea.
* Joke 3- Rajnikanth makes onions cry.
* Joke 4 – Rajnikanth once wrote a cheque, the bank bounced!
* Joke 5 – Rajnikanth can drown a fish.
* Joke 6 – Rajnikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.
* Joke 7 – Rajnikanth knows Victoria’s secret.
* Joke 8 – If Rajni was born 100 years earlier, British would have fought to get independence from India.
* Joke 9 – Rajnikanth’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajnikanth.
* Joke 10 – Once a cobra bit Rajnikanth’s leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
* Joke 11 – Rajnikanth can kill two stones with one bird.
* Joke 12 – Rajnikanth has already been to Mars, that’s why there are no signs of life there.
* Joke 13 – Micheal Jordan to Rajnikanth: I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours. Can you? Rajni: Rascala, how do you think the earth spins?
* Joke 14 – Rajnikanth has counted to infinity, twice.
* Joke 15 – Rajnikanth can delete the Windows Recycle Bin.
* Joke 16 – Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Rajnikanth can throw Brett Favre even further.
* Joke 17 – Hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Rajnikanth can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.
* Joke 18 – Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajnikanth.
* Joke 19 – When you say “no one’s perfect”, Rajnikanth takes this as a personal insult.
* Joke 20 – Rajnikanth is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
* Joke 21 – It takes Rajnikanth 20 mins to watch 60 minutes
* Joke 22 – There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Rajnikanth lives in Chennai
* Joke 23 – Rajnikanth once consumed an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink once.
* Joke 24 – The only thing that runs faster and longer than Rajnikanth are his films.
* Joke 25 – Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajnikanth there is no other way.
* Joke 26 – Rajnikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes.
* Joke 27 – Rajnikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.
* Joke 28 – Rajnikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.
* Joke 29 – Rajnikanth doesn’t move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajnikanth.
* Joke 30 – Rajnikanth knows Victoria’s secret.
* Joke 31 – Water boils faster when Rajnikanth stares at it.
* Joke 32 – Google won’t find Rajnikanth because you don’t find Rajnikanth; Rajnikanth finds you.
* Joke 33 – Rajnikanth leaves messages before the beep.
* Joke 34 – Rajnikanth electrocuted Iron Man.
* Joke 35 – Rajnikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray.
* Joke 36 – Rajnikanth goes to court and sentences the judge.
* Joke 37 – Rajnikanth can teach an old dog new tricks.
* Joke 38 – Rajnikanth once had a heart attack. His heart lost.
* Joke 39 – Rajnikanth can lick his elbows.
* Joke 40 – Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary, Hero etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajnikanth was born.
* Joke 41 – The statement “nobody can cheat death”, is a personal insult to Rajnikanth. Rajni cheats and fools death everyday.
* Joke 42 – Rajnikanth can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin.
* Joke 43 – Time and tide wait for Rajnikanth.
* Joke 44 – Rajnikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, that’s when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean.
* Joke 45 – Rajnikanth can answer a missed call.
* Joke 46 – Rajnikanth’s brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhury’s.
* Joke 47 – The quickest way to a man’s heart is with Rajnikanth’s fist.
* Joke 48 – Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined “victim” as “one who has encountered Rajnikanth”.
* Joke 49 – Rajnikanth is a champion in the Game ‘Hide n seek’, as no one can hide from Rajnikanth.
* Joke 50 – Rajnikanth is a weapon created by God to use on doomsday to end the world.
* Joke 51 – Aliens do indeed exist. They are just too scared to visit a planet that Rajnikanth is on.
* Joke 52 – When Rajnikanth plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.
* Joke 53 – Rajnikanth doesn’t answer nature’s call nature answers Rajnikanth’s call!!
* Joke 54 – In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajnikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.
* Joke 55 – Rajnikanth can build a snowman out of rain!
* Joke 56 – Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Rajanikanth’s PC will crash.
* Joke 57 – Once Rajni underwent a surgery…anesthesia was administered to the surgeons
* Joke 58 – When Rajnikanth goes to a gym to workout, no one can workout since Rajini uses all the weights available.
* Joke 59 – dam and Eve are children of Rajnikanth
* Joke 60 – Rajini can eat dosa with chop sticks
* Joke 61 – Gabbar singh forgets his dialogues when he sees Rajnikanth
* Joke 62 – The box office collection of the movie Ra 1 was less than parking collection of Robot
* Joke 63 – Rajnikanth got 150 questions in exam paper asking – “Solve any 100 questions” He solved all 150 and wrote, ” Rascalla!, check any 100!
* Joke 64 – Once Rajnikanth entered bigg boss…The next day announcement was made… Rajnikanth chahte hai ki bigg boss confession room me aye
* Joke 65 – Rajnikanth can cure cancer with his first aid box
* Joke 66 – Munni Badnaam hui Rajnikanth ke liye
* Joke 67 – If Rajnikanth’s PC hangs… its time for next windows release
* Joke 68 – Rajnikanth taught yoga to Baba Ramdev
* Joke 69 – Rajnikanth can sneeze with open eyes.
* Joke 70 – Once Rajnikanth dropped a coin while he was standing in the belcony… He went down to pick it up, but it was not there! Reason? He reached there before the coin
* Joke 71 – The apple which fell on newton was actually thrown by Rajnikanth
* Joke 72 – Once Rajinikath blasted at a boy for not wearing cap in the hot sun. Today that boy is known as Himesh Reshammiya.
* Joke 73 – When Rajnikanth get angry at the Sun, it hides behind the moon… that phenomenon is called Solar eclipse.
* Joke 74 – Once Rajni was fined by cops for overspeeding at a 75 kilometers per hour zone. He was walking.
* Joke 75 – In Rajnikanth’s wedding, the fire took the saath phere of Rajnikanth and his wife
* Joke 76 – Rajnikanth can tie his shoes with his feet.
* Joke 77 – Rajnikanth once wrote his autobiography. Today that book is known as ‘Guinness book of world records’ and his childhood homework is now called Wikipedia.
* Joke 78 – Rajnikanth first takes the gold medal and then the race starts
* Joke 79 – Rajnikanth laughs at you and your silly jokes about him even before you think them up.
* Joke 80 – Some actor set benchmarks in cinema, Rajnikanth sets desk marks
* Joke 81 – Whenever Rajnikanth makes an error, it’s an invention.
* Joke 82 – Only Rajnikanth knows Choli Ke Peechhe Kya Hai.
* Joke 83 – Rajnikanth twice won arguments with his wife.
* Joke 84 – How did Paul Octopus die? He was asked to predict Rajanikanth’s death.
* Joke 85 – Rajnikanth had to make 24 runs in just 1 ball remaining. He hit the ball in such a way that it got broken into 4 pieces and he got 4 sixes.
* Joke 86 – Even Ghajini remembers Rajini.
* Joke 87 – Don Ko Pakadna Mushkil Hi Nahi Asaan Hai – For Rajnikanth
* Joke 88 – Rajnikanth can make a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.
* Joke 89 – Every morning rajni goes for spacewalk.
* Joke 90 – Computer doesn’t give warning message to Rajini… Rajini warns computer
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